Why macaroni and cheese is bad for you

Mac and cheese is the worst and I hate it. But to be quite honest, I wish I liked it. I really do. My life would be so much easier: I could join in on the cheapest dish on the menu at every restaurant, I'd make it myself when I'm feeling lazy after a long day at work, and I would stop taking so much shit from everyone I meet who finds out I despise the stuff.

I mean seriously, don't you think I want to have that Leslie Knope moment where she's thrilled about Ben making mac and cheese pizza? Of course I do. But I know it'll never happen. Because macaroni and cheese is always going to suck. And I'm here to tell you why. First of all, let me make one thing clear: Cheese is heaven-sent.

And pasta must have also been gifted from angels, but putting the two together—and watering it down with butter, cream, and whatever else—into one soppy, bland mess is a sad excuse for a meal.

In fact, with some of the calorie, sodium, and fat counts, many of these boxes of gold should make you think twice before you pick them off the shelf. You can thank the saturated-fat-laden butter, milk, cheese—or the scientifically-developed chemical alternatives to each of these natural ingredients—and refined-flour noodles for this dish's downfall. But not all boxes have to be sad mistakes for your diet.

We've compiled a list of the best and worst of the boxed mac and cheese available in supermarkets, so you can indulge in nostalgia without totally derailing your diet.

Check out the list below, ranked from not so bad, to the worst of the bunch. And while you're taking a trip down memory lane, be sure to check out these 15 Classic American Desserts That Deserve a Comeback. Banza is made with chickpea pasta, which is naturally a healthier alternative. This variety, which happens to be gluten-free and vegan, comes in at whopping 13 grams of protein and a solid six grams of fiber per serving. Plus, it's the lowest-carb option on this list.

And for a modest calories? You can't ever really go wrong with this dairy-free option. While it is a bit higher in sodium than some others, overall, it's one of the best options out there. You can't really go wrong with any of the Banza flavors, really! The Whole Foods brand you can easily order from Amazon comes in at a—dare we say—modest calories per serving and is low in fat and saturated fat.

The highest levels were found in the cheesy powder used to make the sauce for boxed macaroni and cheese. Two caveats: the report wasn't published in a peer-reviewed journal and it doesn't specify how the levels found in mac and cheese compare with what has been reported to be a problem in scientific articles.

Experts didn't think the report's results should be sensationalized, but suggested that the new data adds to our understanding of how hormone-disrupting chemicals are linked to human health. Phthalates are used in hundreds of products, such as food packaging, personal care products, toys, vinyl flooring and wall covering, and detergents, according to the Food and Drug Administration.

The FDA says it's unclear what effect, if any, phthalates have on people. There have been numerous human studies linking fetal and childhood exposure to these chemicals with a plethora of behavioral and brain development issues, including lower IQ, attention problems, hyperactivity, and poorer social communication skills.

I was scared too, as an occasional non-child consumer. Of course the darker part of me knows I eat it because I want to eat it, because of the sodium and the white pasta-starch that becomes sugar in my veins, and also because of the nostalgic comfort in the ritual of making and eating it.

Those blue and yellow boxes signified the food of my Midwestern childhood. I am not alone in this. Every year Kraft alone sells something like million boxes of their signature product. The gas stations that dot rural America define their grocery sections by its presence. Some research has found that high phthalate exposure can have negative health effects—for example, some people with high levels in their bodies have increased rates of hypertension and insulin resistance—but never has a case of phthalate toxicity been linked specifically to eating macaroni and cheese.

The mac-and-cheese analysis described in the Times story looked for phthalates in processed cheeses, and it found them. It reported absolute levels—e. What does that mean? How much of it stays in my body?

How much macaroni would I have to eat to put myself at risk? This was not a study of the value of action, nor was it a study of the health significance of phthalates in macaroni and cheese. It was only a study that tells us how many micrograms of phthalates are in a kilogram of various forms of powdered cheese. One definitive thing I can recommend, never eat a kilogram of powdered cheese. No earnest analysis of a suspiciously toxic product would stop at giving values of a toxic substance without studying what that value means for human health.

So the role of macaroni and cheese in the phthalate problem is sort of like the role of a particular type of chair in the problem of people living sedentary lifestyles.